Saturday, December 05, 2009

Video Resume

Paul and Ben need a job. Can you help them?

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Yes, And

Paul and Ben record an album's worth of improvised songs.

Paul on guitar and vocals, Ben on drums. Everything is made up on the spot, and it shows.

Here's a sample: "Robot Cat"

Download now!

Friday, November 06, 2009

60 Seconds Max - November 2009

Paul and Ben walk onstage for their 60 seconds.

Then Paul goes off script to rant about how the new "V" is being unjustly labelled as a critique of Obama's policies.


So Ben, in order to steal focus back from Paul, decides to chug a PBR.

It worked.

Sunday, November 01, 2009

Comte's 1st Annual 49th Birthday Fundraiser

Paul and Ben's present to Chris Comte was to pick up a bucket of candy they let him throw into the audience.

Friday, October 02, 2009

Name That Erotica

Paul and Ben premiere their new game show, wherein various audience members are read an erotic paragraph and they have to guess whether it was written by a Conservative Public Figure, or Not.


If the audience member guessed correctly, they got some candy. If they guessed who wrote the passage, they got more candy.

Not very many people won.

Below are the passages. Answers follow.

1) Do you really comprehend how beautiful your smile is? Have you been told lately how warm your eyes are and how they softly glow with the special nature of your soul? I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificently gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines or that I love the curves of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of night’s light — but hey, that would be going into the sexual details we spoke of at the steakhouse at dinner — and unlike you I would never do that!

2) Closing her eyes she concentrated on the tingling sensation of water flowing against her body. Suddenly another sensation intruded. Ashley felt two large hands wrap themselves around her breasts and hot breath on the back of her neck. She opened her eyes wide and giggled.
"I thought you drowned out there, snorkel man."
Tommy O'Malley was naked and at attention.
"Drowning is not an option," he said, "unless of course you beg me to perform unnatural acts right here in this shower."


3) Now in my hotel room. How my favorite young stud doing? You need a massage? Did any girl give you a hand job this weekend? Did you spank it this weekend yourself? Do you really do it face down? Where do you unload it? I always use lotion and the hand. Well I have a totally stiff wood now. Is your little guy limp or growing? I am hard as a rock...so tell me when yours reaches "rock".

4) She moved her hips in a slow undulating circle. He felt himself almost slip inside her, then she pulled herself away. She was getting warmer due to the heat emanating from his groin. His cock strained for her, longed to submerge itself in the ebb and flow of her tide.
"Squeeze," she repeated.
He applied a small bit of pressure to her neck. This was all the assurance she needed. She let go of his hand and shifted her grip to his wrist.
"Harder," she said, pulling his hand toward her throat.
He increased his pressure, and Kim closed her eyes. He felt his glans spread her labia slightly on her return trip, their moisture commingling in dangerous ways.


5) I thought that one day, I would just wake up and realize it was just a stupid fling, just innocent experimentation. I thought that if I admitted the love I had been hiding, society would reject me.
It all started one day when I was twelve. That’s when I found my true love. I had looked this person’s way a few times and got that nervous feeling in my stomach – but I had been taught that this love was forbidden.
Then came the fair, my hand brushed this person’s, my palms began to sweat, my hands began to shake, the Ferris wheel came to a complete stop.
I looked deeply into this person’s eyes, and reached out to softly touch this person’s face.
I leaned in and I kissed my sister.
First our lips met, seconds later our tongues. I ran my fingers through her silky hair and felt her soft skin. It was the height of passion and the moment I knew who my true love was. We knew we had done something so wrong, but at the same time, something so very right.
Since then we have met in secret several times. My sister and I are in love, I realize that I am different, but am I so different that I haven’t earned the right to love? I simply ask you to be tolerant.
We will make love.


1) Yes. Mark Sanford, Republican Governor of South Carolina
2) Yes. Bill O'Reilly from "Those Who Trespass - A Novel of Murder & Television"
3) Yes. Mark Foley - Former Republican Congressman from Florida's 16th District
4) No. Paul Gude from "Love in a Time of Zombies"
5) Yes. Glenn Beck from "The Real America"

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Seattle Sketchfest

Paul and Ben string together some of their finer pieces for a total of about 25 continuous minutes onstage at Theatre Off Jackson. From the official Seattle Sketchfest website:

This absurdist duo has been haunting the halls of Seattle's comedy and theater scenes for ages, leaving audiences in tears, or in, like, crying tears, or stunned, or all three, while they also do five or six other things to them that are intense and provocative and weirdly brilliantly funny. Paul Gude and Ben Laurance do it all, and they do it all well, and they do it all in a way that is hard to explain to someone who wasn't there. So ... don't not be there.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

News and Updates

We've been quiet here on the Gude/Laurance blog lately. We're busy preparing for our appearance at Sketchfest Seattle - running Monday September 21st through Saturday the 26th.

We're performing at the Opening Night Gala on Monday, and will perform a whole set on Thursday the 24th at 7:30pm.

Find more details at http://www.sketchfest.org.

Also, if you're into the Facebook thing, you can now become a fan of us. Check the sidebar for a link.

Friday, September 04, 2009

It's A Good Thing You're So Cute

Paul and Ben perform their song "It's A Good Thing You're So Cute (Daddy Needs To Sleep)" at Spin the Bottle in September.


Fortunately, no audio record exists of this event.

Friday, July 03, 2009

Cereal Killer

Paul and Ben's assignment for the July 2009 Spin the Bottle is "Silence". The concept is that we're eating breakfast together. Ben chows down on Honey Comb and Paul on Cap'n Crunch.


However things get rather competitive.


Which escalates into a full-on battle using the "toys" inside the boxes. A sword out of the Cap'n Crunch box for Paul, and a comb covered in honey from Ben's Honey Comb box. Paul realized the honey covered comb could upset his hair, so he backs away, leaving Ben the victor.


Okay, so it wasn't totally silent.


"That's right, bitch! You don't know nothin!"

Thursday, June 25, 2009

StB, Jr at Bumbershoot

Paul and Ben also performed two pieces at the Spin the Bottle, Jr presentation at Bumbershoot 09. An original song called "It's A Good Thing You're So Cute (Please Let Daddy Sleep)" and Sleeping Bag Sumo.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Skates or Blades? Redux

Paul and Ben re-visit that age-old question "Which is better: Rollerskates or Rollerblades?" at the June 09 Spin the Bottle Jr.

After lining up, our referee Laura blows the whistle and we take off across the stage for the finish line.


It's very difficult because neither of us can skate very well.


Before we are able to complete the race, Laura turns our race into a dodgeball game and invites all the kids in the audience to come up and throw balls at us.


Referee Laura then declares rollerskates the winner.

Friday, June 05, 2009

The Murder Files, Part 2: The Wire

Paul and Ben have the smut slot for the June 2009 Spin the Bottle. The filming of the event didn't turn out quite as well as we'd hoped, but there is a picture and an audio clip.

Please feel free to stare at the below picture while listening to the embedded audio clip. It's almost like being there!





Special thanks go out to Pamala Mijatov, Lindsay Hunter, Chris Dietz, and Daniel Christensen.

Saturday, May 02, 2009

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun



Girls dancing in slow motion.

Friday, April 03, 2009

User Generated Art

Performance at Annex Theatre's Spin the Bottle


We had audience members contribute to a painting.




Then we invited them up on stage to find words that were attached to Paul's person.


User Generated Art.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

The Werehouse



Late-night television viewing uncovers an odd commercial.

Monday, January 26, 2009

A New Year's Spectacle



Paul and Ben ring in the New Year with some friends.